♪♪ [elevator music] Why is that– Woman [on phone]:Hi,
how can I help you?
Yeah, hi. My refrigerator’s broken.Okay, how old
is the refrigerator?
Just bought it yesterday. What brand? Uh, Hoshizaki. Okay, and how did you
pay for it?Incash.And what
seems to be the problem?Um,it just keeps spilling ice
all over my floor. Okay, what material
is the floor made of? Wood? Great. And on a scale of 1 to 10, how pure would you say the
water is that’s being frozen?Uh,10, is that important? Average annual income? I– I’m sorry, what does that have to do
with my refrigerator?Just standard
informational questions, sir.
Average annual income?[sighs] Seventy thousand.Okay,are you married? Yes. Happily? Yes, is this my mother-in-law?Scale of 1 to 10?Ten! Can we move on? Yes. Do you have any
medical problems or personal disabilities?Uh,no. Okay, and what’d you have
for dinner last night? How– Wait, what did I have
for dinner? Meatloaf. How many helpings? Two. Scale of 1 to 10? What– This is
my mother-in-law! Nancy.Have youever had to protect
your home from wild animals?No.Wait, we had mice last week.Have yourchildren ever been
pressed into military service? No. I mean, I wouldn’t mind
if they were, you know
what I’m saying?Okay.Onelast question. Have you ever had an egregious violation
of your basic human rights? Wh– What? No! Seriously, my refrigerator–Okay, just to sum things up,
you are a healthy,
happily married,
socially acceptable, free man
living outside of any war zones
with a roof over your head, food on your table,
and asteady income,calling today to complain
about your new top-of-the-line
refrigerator paid for
in cash
that seems to be spilling
frozen filtered water all over your non-dirt floor. Is that correct? [speechless] [phone beeps] Mm-hmm. Hi, thank you for calling
“First World Hotline,” how may I help you? Oh, hey there. I just have one question. How do I subscribe? Oh, you just click
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the thumbs-up to like and you can comment below about your favorite part
of the sketch! Wow, that was way more
information than I asked for. I like to be helpful,
you know? You’re a very good
customer person. Thank you. Thank you!